I have been feeling happy for no reason which is good.
I have been feeling angst over very mild issues which is bad.
I have been feeling emotional because of some people which is bad.
I am experiencing this shitty feeling at this very moment. Probably due to the stress and lack of sleep and the stress that is building up. :(
Uni life is really fun, the friends that i made are awesome but the workloads is very heavy! In order to excel, you really need to keep up with the lectures pace. This is especially difficult because half the time the lecturers are just delivering what is on the lecture notes. It is as good as reading the lecture notes which encourage me to pon most of my lectures. Hahahaha! Well, after skipping one whole week of lectures, i learnt my lesson and attend most of the lectures! OMG! You cannot imagine how tedious it is to watch the boring webcast! How about fast-forwarding it? How about NO?! Alright, next! Tutorials are pain in the ass! I rushed almost all my tutorials Hahahaha! What the shit! Anyway we have this burden clique in my course and all of us are burden one way or the other. This clique make uni life so much more bearable! Although we know each other for a very short two months only, we are pretty close. Must be those drinking, HTHT and outings that bind us chugether! LOLOLOL! I think everybody is stress about schoolworks so i shall not rant any further! I know i can do this and i will do it!
A picture of the burdens :)
All the long bus ride to school and back home make me think a lot like really a lot, about myself, my family, my friends and my life. I really miss my JC life, all the friends i know there and my class! My very bonded class! Hahahaha! Reminiscing those memories. Awww~ So... funny! HAHAHA! I cannot forget how funny wj is! He will always do random actions at random time of the day! Cannot forget the part that he squeeze his chest and shouted RANDOMLY which mdm shalwa do not know how to react! Was laughing so badly that we can barely breathe! Those malay guys never fail to laugh at my very poor command of English HAHAHA! My bimbo deskmate, HTHT buddies and friends i know from other class! OMG those sweet two years! How about JC life without the study part? Hahahaha!
A picture of my class :D
Those happy sweet memories~ AWWWWW!
Hmmm was feeling very down, very very very emotional these few days!
You probably don't get me when i said you deserve a second chance, just the second one.
I don't know why but this group of friends that i have... is very different. I know im a whiny bitch or probably just a bitch but i cant help it :( Idk why they are being like this or maybe im the one that change. Maybe I've changed to be more dependent on friends, to want to be more included. Maybe because my friends in jc make me feel included and make that extra effort to meet up even though everyone is damn busy with life. Uni friends.. i don't dare to say much but currently we are quite bonded. we meet quite often though most of them are busy with hall life and everyone has their own outside friends :) Sometimes, i feel very blessed that every stage of my life i met friends that are willing to take that extra effort to keep this friendship. Maybe it is just me that expect too much from this particular group of friends :( but im somehow affected by their actions :( Or probably they are in their clique and i don't belong there! :( I have told myself to heck it for a lot of times and this time im really gonna heck it. Somehow i feel whatever i did wasn't appreciated and they took it for granted. When you truly appreciate it, you or at least i will feel it. You don't need to constantly thank me, get it? This is really tiring :( And if you think it is easy to just let go of everything just that like, you are definitely wrong. This is like the worst feeling right now but i know i will feel better after some time. At least i wont feel so affected by whatever they are doing :(((((
One of my friend told me that "friends come and go, the true ones will stay" Hmmm i hope so :(
In the past, i always thought that if i make that extra effort to forge this friendship, it would last but i was wrong! It takes two hands to clap.
Probably feeling emotional about this group of friends and some time later i will get better? I will continue to care? AHHHHHHHHHHH! HOW ABOUT FO!
yea, i use a lot of probably and this is probably all i have to say *big sigh* so much better.
